This is going to be a hard post but I want to be real. I want to be vulnerable; I want to embrace the struggle. We as a society try to cover up our pain, we fake how we feel, we burry the pain and hide what we are going through. It’s scary being vulnerable but it’s the bravest thing one can do. We post pictures, we tell stories, we create this idea that everything in our life is working out when behind the scenes we are fighting. I am fighting. We associate failure to shame and so we burry and hide it, we cover it up, force ourselves to smile when we really want to cry. If we are just honest and face what God is putting in our life then WE CAN USE THE PAIN TO SET US UP FOR THE GLORY. I believe we go through tough times to set others free so by hiding our pain or lying about it we are leaving someone in the dark. We can light the way for others and ourselves but it takes honesty, bravery, and the notion that you will fail. Failure is a part of life; it doesn’t mean you lost, not at all. FAILURE IS A PLATFORM FOR CHANGE, FOR GROWTH, AND FOR SUCCESS, WE JUST HAVE TO BE BRVE ENOUGH TO FACE IT.
Failure brings out our insecurities, it makes us feel like we are standing naked in front of a crowd of people and we have a target on our back. It is freaking scary. We feel shameful and bow our heads but when we do that we then miss the lesson which leads to the blessing. We can help so many people and ourselves if we just cut the shit and face the struggle, admit where you are and jump in head first. When things don’t go our way we point the finger back at ourselves, negative self-talk is introduced and we bully ourselves. We hurt ourselves but why? At the end of the day it is our soul that we sleep with so we should be protecting ourselves instead of bruising ourselves. We should be loving ourselves and practicing self-love and understanding.
It starts with loving yourself and giving yourself a break. Protect the inner child in you, don’t bully it. We all go through seasons and sometimes that season includes drought but it isn’t the end, it’s just an avenue to the final destination. The Israelites roamed the desert for 40 years. For 40 years they went through a season of drought but they kept walking, they kept going. They didn’t blame themselves, they didn’t fake the struggle, they simply lived in it and kept walking. We have to own the hard times and know that there is a purpose for everything. Right now to be honest, I don’t see my purpose in this move. I am roaming through the desert and I’m vulnerable, I’m scared, I’m confused. God led me here and yet all I’ve been facing is one failure after the other. I feel like I’m not strong enough to keep going but then I remember all my blessings. I remember I can light someone’s path so that is why I am sharing my struggle. In order to get rid of the struggle I have to name it and face it.
We can’t always be on the sidelines of life just observing because we are scared to fail. The only option in life is to get in the freaking arena and give it your hardest. DON’T EVER MEASURE YOUR WORTH IN FAILURES, BUT IN LESSONS. Some of the biggest lessons come from the deepest pits. To God it’s not called failure, he is just redirecting you. He closed the door but every time one closes another opens. I’m trying to not get down and out but man is it hard to do life when you feel like you are failing. It’s so easy to let that pain seep into other parts of your life and before you know it you feel trapped and worthless. Listen to me, it happened for a reason, God redirected you for a reason all you have to do is be honest with yourself and others. God already knows you’re ashamed and he is the almighty so why are we scared to show our shame to ordinary people who have at one point another felt shame as well? Share your story; reach out to your community because God gave us one another to build each other up.
ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT THERE IS SOMETHING IN THE PIT THAT GOD IS GOING TO USE. The way to best handle failure is to be obedient to God. When our heart aligns with His then some incredible things are bound to happen. See, we ask God to get us out of the hard time but then when he calls us we don’t go. We will never get out of the pit unless we are obedient and live in God’s word. I’m not saying it’s easy because when you’re going through hell all you want to do is yell at God but we have to remain on course. Last night I laid in bed yelling at God in my head, “Why do I keep getting hurt, why aren’t you giving me a break, why are my prayers not answered”. The thing I’m learning though is that you have to go through prison to know what it feels like to be free. PAIN GROWS US AND ATHOUGH IT FEELS LIKE OUR HEART IS BREAKING IT REALLY IS JUST BEING USED IN NEW WAYS. We are built by each season and drought; we have to go through the desert to get to the well.
When it comes to yelling at God, I am all for it. Listen, God already knows what we are going to say he is just waiting for us to say it. Stop hiding from the person who already knows. He is a big boy, he can take it. THE THING IS THOUGH THAT WE STAND AND YELL AT GOD WHEN WE SHOULD BE ON OUR KNEES. We need to humble ourselves in these hard times. The only way to submit to God is to humble yourself. THE ONLY WAY TO GET OUT OF THE PIT IS TO GET ON YOUR KNEES.
Pits carry lessons, failure is redirection, and droughts bring us to wells. Live in the arena of life and know that failure will come but the only way up is to start down. Our hearts hurt because its experiencing new things, we will survive, we will make it and not only make it but thrive. Last night I got on my knees and cried. I cried to the Lord and told him exactly how I was feeling because the only way out is in. I’m hurting and putting up the biggest fight I have fought but I know I’m not the only one fighting; I have someone standing in front of me taking the major blows. I will get through this, I will share my struggle and I will embrace it.